‘Book Club’ Kicks off with a Breathtaking Montage of Photoshop Fails

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Book Club (2018)

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Let’s make one thing clear up top: I am not here to drag Book Club! This movie is a senior citizen romcom with a flavor that can only be described as imitation Nancy Meyers, and one that’s best paired with a big glass of red wine. Did I see this movie in theaters with my husband on opening night? Yes. Were we the only gays in the theater? No. Were we the only people under 40 in the theater? Yes. Did we live? Yaaaas!

This movie stars four absolute legends (Diane Keaton, Jane Fonda, Candice Bergen, Mary Steenburgen) and it’s a must-watch now that it’s streaming on Hulu. What other movie gives you a Meat Loaf dance routine, a battle between Candice Bergen and a pair of Spanx, and an extended boner gag featuring Craig T. Nelson?

There’s one thing about Book Club that I will clock, though: the Photoshop. Book Club truly loves a green-screen moment and, even more than that, it loves hasty Photoshop jobs. This isn’t just a knock against just Book Club, though, because every single fake photograph you see in every single movie or TV show is deserving of side-eye. Somehow movie magic can bring monsters to life and blow up planets, but getting a believable wedding photo of your leads in 1980 is the tallest of orders! Gollum, yes; young Mary Steenburgen in a waitress getup, impossible.

The reason Book Club’s Photoshop fail indulgence stuck with me fully months after I left the theater, mind totally blown by the light comedy antics I’d just witnessed, is because the film starts with a truly wild Photoshop job.

Book Club bad photoshop, young cast
Photo: Hulu

This is the first shot of the movie–a movie starring four actresses that have 4 Oscars and 6 Emmys located in their individual palatial yet tasteful estates! Even my untrained eye can catch the goofs: these four photos were taken under drastically different lighting in different eras (Keaton’s photo is serving Gidget while Steenburgen’s has an early ’80s big-hair-don’t-care vibe). The resolutions are all over the place and Keaton’s Elasti-Girl arm has a mystifying drop shadow happening. I also have to wonder where the rest of Keaton’s body is supposed to be in this pic? I know these characters are supposed to be close, but those three are literally standing in Keaton’s back.

So that’s the first shot of the movie. If that was it, I’d be able to move on and write extensively about how Alicia Silverstone came to play in this movie. But there’s more than one Photoshop fail in this opening sequence! The first five minutes of Book Club is totally [Photo]shop ’til you drop!

Here are the women standing in front of Jane Fonda’s character’s hotel, all sporting hairstyles from different decades. Going off the reality this photo presents, either Fonda’s ‘do was hella dated or Keaton’s bangs were ahead of their time.

Book Club bad photoshop, cast
Photo: Hulu

Fortunately for fans of iffy Photoshop (and unfortunately for the definitely harried graphic designer that had to spend an hour tearing through Getty and turning out every single one of these pics), we also get youthful shots of the Book Club ladies’ men. Here’s young Don Johnson in full Richie Sambora goes to the rodeo drag!

Book Club bad photoshop, young Don Johnson
Photo: Hulu

This Photoshop job gives young Johnson the proportions of a Funk Pop!, right?

Then we get to see a pic of Candice Bergen’s lawyer character with her ex-husband (Ed Begley Jr.) in happier times when they used to hang out in formal wear in front of a vignette effect.

Book Club bad photoshop, young Candice Bergen, Ed Begley Jr
Photo: Hulu

There’s something very Gary Oldman Dracula about Begley’s head shape in this one.

Next up is Mary Steenburgen’s character, a super successful chef who started out as a waitress working at a diner located on the downward-sloping side of a hill.

Book Club bad photoshop, young Mary Steenburgen
Photo: Hulu

The one person that comes off looking good in this Photoshop feast has to be young Craig T. Nelson, who gets a new body that’s roughly in proportion–and it’s one riding a motorcycle!

Book Club bad photoshop, young Craig T Nelson
Photo: Hulu

Oh wait–I spoke too soon, because Nelson and Steenburgen also get this.

Book Club bad photoshop, Craig T Nelson Mary Steenburgen family
Photo: Hulu

Let me reiterate: Book Club is exactly as breezy as the soft blue background and white ribbon twirl effects around these pics lead you to believe. I recommend this movie heartily to everyone who counts at least one of the four leads as an all-time fave. Just be prepared to see all of their heads affixed to younger bodies with fuzzed out chins and blurry necks!

After we meet all four ladies, the movie gets going in earnest and the Photoshop parade wraps up. But if you think that’s the last quickly thrown together ‘shop job in Book Club, you are wrong! Candice Bergen’s plotline involves her dipping her toes into the online dating pool, which means we get to experience the absolute worst kind of fake movie picture: the fake vacation pic! Witness a bone-dry Ed Begley Jr. and his young GF shoving a dolphin down into the crystal clear water of Tropical Beach!

Book Club bad photoshop, Ed Begley bumble beach photo
Photo: Hulu

Like, I know that logistically Ed Begley Jr. and Mircea Monroe were definitely in the same room together standing in front of a green-screen for this…but I honestly think Begley’s head might have been somewhere else completely? These are all so rushed, I actually kind of love them.

Just to prove how slapdash I know these Photoshop jobs had to have been, I tasked Decider’s resident graphic design maestro Dillen Phelps with coming up with my own Book Club-style photo montage. He spent roughly 15 minutes on each masterpiece, and this is what we got:

Brett in a bar
Photos: Getty ; Illustration: Dillen Phelps
Brett at Washington DC
Photos: Getty ; Illustration: Dillen Phelps

There’s also the time I hung out with Bob Newhart holding a sword…

Brett and Bob as friends
Photos: Getty ; Illustration: Dillen Phelps

… and the time we visited Stonehenge.

Brett with Bob Newhart at Stonehenge
Photos: Getty, Everett ; Illustration: Dillen Phelps

But of all these memories, the one I’ll treasure most is the time I spent hanging out with my gals–the gals… of Book Club.

Brett with the Book Club cast
Photos: Hulu ; Illustration: Dillen Phelps

Stream Book Club on Hulu