‘The Americans’ Recap, Season Three Episode One: “EST Men”

The stakes have never been higher for the KGB after Soviet leader Leonid Brezhnev passes away. Stan visits est in attempt to win back Sandra, and Philip gets laid left and right in the Season Three premiere of FX’s Cold War drama, The Americans.

…previously on The Americans.

The episode opens with Elizabeth (Keri Russell) submerged in the bathtub thinking back to the first time she took her daughter, Paige, swimming. A reluctant little Paige is terrified, literally shaking in fear as Elizabeth pushes her closer to the edge, assuring her that everything is going to be fine, just fine, it’s only water, you’ll learn in no time — before scanning the room to see if any other mothers were watching and throwing her kin into the water.

Back in Season One, Elizabeth was concerned that if anything were to happen to her and Philip (Matthew Rhys), their son Henry would be the one to bounce back, not Paige. Fearing she’s too weak, too sensitive, Elizabeth is significantly harder on her daughter (like her own mother was with her) than Henry, even though Paige can “think circles around people” according to Philip and is already extremely aware of her parents mysterious late-night trips in and out of the house. But Elizabeth’s concern in the bath is not of, Will my daughter be able to survive? But rather, if Paige were to be recruited by the KGB as the Soviet Centre ordered, she might just be able to do it and be a successful agent, as Elizabeth has been challenging her to sink or swim her whole life.

Cut to Elizabeth in one of her less-than-flattering wigs, pressing a disgruntled female CIA agent for intel. Over drinks, Miss CIA informs Elizabeth that she could have been a decorated member of the organization if the organization wasn’t such a boys club and didn’t promote people based on their genitalia. After handing over a list of government names involved with Soviet relations in Afghanistan and before walking to the bathroom, caving, and calling her supervisor for backup to arrest Elizabeth, there’s a flash of a connection between the two women. Two government employees, who have put their lives, reputations, and families on the line for their work, only to be served with more work and no real reward other than representing their country. Yet it’s clear that Miss CIA, who’s significantly older than Elizabeth, will never be respected in her field, whereas Elizabeth, a crusader of the cause, certainly has and will continue to be the poster girl for the KGB — a contrasting difference in how American and Soviet women are treated in their respective workforces.

So now the exciting part: Elizabeth gets fucking caught by the FBI, by Agent Gaad — yep, Stan’s boss — no less. But, of course, this Commie doesn’t go down without a fight, and though they give her a good whoopin’, Elizabeth turns up the fierceness a notch and beats the shit out of both of them before making a clean getaway. But not, unfortunately, before losing her precious intel.

While Elizabeth is taking down top government officials, Philip and Stan (Noah Emmerich) are having a bros’ night out at est, of all places, in a valiant effort by Stan to woo back Sandra (Susan Misner), who left him last season for one of her fellow group members who we have yet to meet. est, which stands for Erhard Seminars Training, is a glorified self-help group that emerged out of San Francisco in the early ’70s and dissolved in the mid-1980s. Sandra took to EST after discovering her husband of almost twenty years was having an affair (though she never asked who). When Stan drops some more of her stuff off the next day (at the mysterious EST man’s abode), he confesses he went to a meeting —  fibbing at first about it being “pretty interesting stuff” before admitting that it was “total bullshit.” Which it is. I mean, c’mon, that orgasm monologue? Here’s an acronym for you, EST: STFU. But something good came out of this little tiff and it’s that Stan was actually honest with Sandra for once.

Back at the Jennings’ household, things are extremely tense between Philip and Elizabeth after last season’s news about Paige being seasoned for the KGB. Elizabeth has been tagging along with the teen to Sunday masses and youth group volunteering: extremely liberal gatherings centered around anti-war and anti-nuclear weapon demonstrations, which seems to appease Elizabeth, who likes that her daughter’s mind is open to various points of view. This is exactly what she tells Gabriel (Frank Langella), Philip and Elizabeth’s former supervisor before Claudia (Margo Martinale, who had to leave to shoot The Millers on CBS — now cancelled), who’s now back in the picture. Gabriel, though feeble and grandfatherly, definitely has something up his sleeve regarding Paige, which is something Philip wants no part of whatsoever and is the reason why he’s such a dick-slinging prick in this season opener.

It’s war over Paige’s future and Philip is taking it out on Elizabeth by enjoying lots of sex with everyone but her (there’s even some crazy sweaty Kama Sutra thrown in with Martha). Elizabeth, who’s unaware of all this ho-ing and blowing, receives word that her mother is dying, which could directly affect her decision regarding Paige and the KGB, but it’s too early to tell how.

Philip is in cahoots again with Annelise (from whom he received some unexpected road head), even though she has fallen in love with the KGB’s Swedish intelligence target, Yosaf. She promises Philip she’ll keep plucking him for intel, but that “he deserves better.” Later, while listening in to their sex, Philip hears things go quiet and that’s because Annelise confesses and, instead of working with her, he chokes her to death. In storms Philip, who, first, points out the obvious, “This is very bad,” before reasoning with his target, “I can make this go away.” END SCENE.

Well thanks FX, just how are we supposed to sleep now?

Field notes and other observations:

1. Stan finally teaches Martha to use her little pistol, and bad news for Clark, she’s not a bad shot.

2. Elizabeth is training another new recruit after last season’s death of Lucia. He’s ugly though, so there’s no way she’s going to sleep with him.

3. It was SO. FUNNY. seeing young Tom Brokaw on an old Zenith box set. #Memories.

4. Just a prediction, but I think the warped EST speaker will turn out to be Sandra’s new man.

5. The FBI is tracking a chick who’s due to come into the country soon. She’s a U.S. Canada Institute official, which no one seems to know what that means, but the important takeaway is that she works as a double agent for the KGB.

6. IN NINA NEWS: Sadly, our favorite double-crossing double-crosser, Nina Sergeevna was tried for treason against the motherland and will face execution if no one steps in to defend her. Sexy Oleg wants to play Superman against Soviet Embassy leader Arkady’s wishes and help his former love, even if she might still be in love with Stan. This is great news because, honestly, her storyline has always been the most complicated and fun to watch.

7. There’s a Nina replacement at the embassy and Arkady isn’t sure if him and Oleg should open up to her like they did Nina. These Russian woman, man, they’ll get ya.

8. Paige likes a boy and Henry got a much needed haircut. All is right in the world of the little Jennings. For now.

 

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Photos: FX Networks